The global problem that seems kind of made up, but isn't.
I do rather like your space magnet theory! I also have been left thinking since Haley’s article…. Why not deploy some sort of “space dragnet” behind the next SpaceX rocket (or other private entity). Or get one delivered to the ISS, and they could deploy it with a little robot space drone, who could make a sweep with it then head towards the sun for burn up when the net is full! Way and cheap. … right?
I'm not a fan of White Stripes although, at least, it's uniquely derivative. I think Neil Young has been a bigger proponent of the vinyl revival. He's been doing it longer.
As for space junk, I've seen articles about it since 1980. There was an international scare when Skylab lost orbit. Everyone thought that their house was going to be hit. I see a article every five years . At one point it will come true but I have other things to worry about.LOL.